BUFFALO FARTS

buffalo-on-Southwestern-plains

AMERICAN BISON

This is where all of these climate problems started. When the settlers started moving westward, they were met with stiff resistance ( there’s that word again ) from the native Americans. If only those poor suckers could have anticipated what was going to happen they could have built a friggin’ wall somewhere east of St. Louis. The great plains was like a damn freeway, those white suckers just rolled into Wyoming like a whirlwind. Those evil white folks and cavalry figured out pretty dang quick that the bison was the mainstay of the native Americans, for their basic needs. So it only made sense to kill off the bison and starve out their foes. So the slaughter began.

By the late 1800’s most of those pesky bison had been eliminated and the native Americans were officially conquered. However, Karma was about the reach out and touch those evil white folks. Little did they know that those millions of bison were expelling methane gas by millions of cubic feet, causing the temperature on the great plains to rise. The absence of the bison farts caused the temperatures to plunge. 1889 was freaking cold, and became the standard by which to measure cold winters. There were only 45 states at the time, and the bone chilling cold invaded every single one of them.

Tallahassee Florida dipped to minus 2 degrees on Feb. 13, 1889. The only sub zero temperature in the city’s history. It was minus 16 degrees in Minden Nebraska. Yep, killing all of those bison, and eliminating those buffalo farts, had a dire affect on the weather. The numbers of bison are growing again, they are no longer on the endangered species list, and our weather is warming up again. It was that simple.

The experts really have no idea what they are talking about. Cow farts are nowhere near as potent as buffalo farts. So my point is that we need to monitor the number of buffalo until we get the climate exactly right, and then make sure we keep the numbers of buffalo right at that point. Sorta like a big thermostat. Geronimo probably could have told those white guys that if they had just asked him. But then, they probably wouldn’t have listened.

Here is a fact you may not know,  Hollywood made a movie in 1971 titled ” Bless the Beasts and the Children” and probably saved the American Bison from extinction along with the rest of the world. If the American Bison had gone extinct, we would have been plunged into another ice age. Can we ever thank Hollywood enough?

VERITAS VINCIT   ~   LIVE FREE OR DIE

Ocasio Cortez

 I SWEAR, I DID NOT KNOW ALL OF THAT SHIT!

A special thank you to Leif Erickson of Centennial, Wyoming for the scientific data.

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